Monday, December 05, 2005

Organic Ruby Crescent Potato

Mr. Stud Spud! Organic Ruby Crescent Potato

I receive a box weekly box of organic produce from a farm in Washington. Two weeks ago, my box contained this unusual prize. It's hard to describe, but with one look and you know what you are seeing.

This potato has the potential to change the behavior of grown up men, professional men, men who are usually pretty level-headed and, well, kind of boring, - back into adolescents. Yes, many people have held Mr. Potato, admired him, smirked and joked about him, even walked around with him hanging out of their unzipped fly. Mr. Spud brings joy and laughter wherever he goes.

He is organic. He is not perfect though. Somehow (I shudder to think HOW?), he has contracted human papilloma virus - and he has genital warts. This was diagnosed by a physician, but based only on examination, not a viral culture. And he is circumcised - that's clearly apparent. But he is a recent harvest, so I'm not sure how he got all this "experience."

Do you want to share this curiosity with friends? Admire it when you are all alone? Give the ultimate gag gift? (After all, it is only a potato.) Perhaps it could be a fertility omen. You could bring it to your office Christmas party - think of the conversations it could start - or stop!

The utility of Mr. Stud Spud is as limitless as were my choices of names - I had so many suggestions: Mr. Potato Head, Studley Spudly, One-eyed Jack, s-pud..............maybe you have a better name?

If you are the lucky winner of this studley tuber I will ship him the day I receive payment - wrapped snugly in your choice of denim, black satin, or rhinestone studded leopard spandex. If no one buys him, he's destined for either curry or stew.
Posted by N.H :: 5:52 PM :: 0 comments

Post a Comment

---------------oOo---------------